Simple Minded Men

This is so spot on. We men always have to think about things like this... Click on it to make it bigger or click here .

Jayanne whe she was little

Jayanne brought a DVD rip from an old family home video back from Brazil. I took some screen caps from it to put up because I thought she was sooo cuuute in it!

James Dean

I read all over the internet how Robert Pattinson was the new James Dean, that is, before Twilight came out, but I always thought my father-in-law looked much more like him.

Red Beard Runner

I saved my old Lego's from my mom's house in Magna and I thought I'd try to put together one of the pirate ships. Since the plans were long gone I found a site on the internet that had scans of old Lego plans, downloaded them, then streamed them to my TV using my XBOX 360. Here are some pics:

The Plans I found:

Streaming them to my TV:

The mess I'm making:

Lindsay helps find pieces:

And her cat in every picture:

Lindsay's making her own ship:

My progress so far:
Click images to embiggen...

Suppositoria

I was at the nurses' station the other day when one of my fellow nurses came out holding up a suppository and said, "wouldn't it be embarrassing to have to work in a suppository factory? Well just imagine having to work for this company!" I took a look at the package and the label said Manufacturer: Suppositoria. I had to add my comment, "What'd be worse is if you had to tell everybody you worked in the receiving dock at Suppositoria! Yeah, you know I keep the back room stocked and make sure that what goes out leaves smoothly...!"


By the way... never do a Google Image search of the word "suppository"!

The Simpsons

I've always loved The Simpson's. I'm one of those die hard, raving mad, relentless fans. Unfortunately, mine is a dying breed. It's no longer cool to be a Simpson's fan. Quoting the Simpson's is now not only considered passe but is frequently met with contempt. "Anyone can quote The Simpson's" was a response I recently overheard to a quote made from one such fan, spoken with as much sarcasm as could be expressed. It breaks my heart! As one who prides myself on my ability to quote a line from The Simpson's to meet any situation I just can't stand by and do nothing anymore. Even my very own family, those of you reading this right now, have stopped watching it. I can't believe things have come to this. It's time to have a serious conversation about the whole thing.
Now I'm just going to attack the problem at it's root right away. There may be several reasons why people have stopped watching it but as ravenous a fan as I am, I'm able to look at it rationally. I know what the problem is. For the first few years the show was edgy. It pushed the limits of what the public was willing to take from an animated program, a medium that was supposed to be reserved for kids on Saturday morning. I remember my dad wouldn't let my sisters and I watch it because he felt that it belittled fathers in general. (The irony was not lost on me even at 12 when I learned he was secretly enjoying Married with Children at the same time.) But for all the controversy surrounding it that's not why it was successful. It was heartwarming at the same time. Controversy may get somebody to watch your show a time or two but it won't stand the test of time. A classic has to offer something deeper. You can watch any one of the first 100 episodes and take a meaningful, moral life lesson from it. Bart frequently got into trouble but always learned from it and was drawn closer to his dysfunctional family. I can think of so many examples that illustrate this that my head is swimming! Let's take the episode where Bart sneaks off to neighborhood bully Nelson Muntz' house lured by Nelson's recent acquisition of a BB gun against Marge's explicit forbidding him to go. He ends up accidentally killing a bird and finding that the bird has left a nest full of eggs, infuriating and alienating his mother in the process. He feels so bad that he nurses the eggs in his treehouse, while Marge feigns apathy at his continued disobedience. When carniverous Bolivian tree lizards hatch instead of chicks Bart protects them from would-be exterminators. No one understands how he could love a creature that so many consider a monster. But Marge sees herself in the situation, a mother who unconditionally loves Bart, no matter how bad he can sometimes be, and helps Bart free the lizards. Episodes like this are what made The Simpson's so popular.
The problem is that after the first few seasons someone decided that the show was growing stale, though many, including the show's own writers not to mention myself, felt that The Simpson's reached perfection by the fourth season. (My all time favorite episode, Lisa the Vegetarian, was from the fourth season.) So somebody decided to move away from the heartwarming format and towards a more in-your-face style. This happened slowly. So slowly that it is hard to notice unless you sit down to a good, old-fashioned Simpson's marathon. By the tenth season Bart was out and Homer was clearly the star of the show. He wasn't really the same Homer from the show's beginning, however. Now, instead of a bumbling but good-intentioned Joe Sixpack, he was a cruel drunk who could be downright mean sometimes. I think this is about the time the show started losing some of its viewers. At the very least I know that this is about when my family stopped watching regularly.
Thankfully, the show has come full circle in the last few seasons. If you haven't watched much in the last few years give it another try. You'll see a lot of the same heartwarming stuff that made the show so great in the beginning. There have also been quite a few episodes lately that really show off that Harvard wit that the made some of the first episodes so unforgettable. If you don't want to wait until Sunday you can see the most recent episodes for free online. Try this site: http://www.hulu.com/the-simpsons .
The Simpson's is so much a part of me that the day they stop making it I won't die a little, I'll die a lot... and I may never be the same! I just can't stand to see it dipping in popularity, especially now that it's back to what it used to be. I'm afraid that the people who lost interest and moved on to other things years ago won't come back to it. If you're one of them YOU'RE MISSING OUT! I once sent out emails to the companies that advertised during The Simpson's thanking them for sponsoring my favorite program and promising to purchase the goods they advertised. I've decided to start that up again and encourage everyone I know to do the same. Come on people! Homer needs us! Keep The Simpson's alive! If I end up having to cake a stick of Secret Clinical Strength onto my armpits and go to Menlove Dodge Toyota to pick up a 2009 Ram 1500 ensured by Geico and then cruise over to Applebee's for a Pick-a-Pair lunch combo for only $5.99 just to keep The Simpson's on the air for one more week then damnit, that's what I'll do!

Brazilian Food

Jayanne says Lindsay's been eating everything in Brazil this time. Here's some pics:

Lindsay's old standby: chocolate Milk!

Chocolate dipped strawberries? I'm not sure what that is exactly...

Macaroni, I think. Whatever it is it must be hot!

This is the only way I'll eat fish... on the beach!

I don't know about this one...

...but Lindsay liked it!

Crab on the beach... they're so small you hardly taste them. Jayanne ate 6!

Apparently Lindsay likes coconut water... just like her Daddy!

Firefox

I recently started using Firefox instead of Internet Explorer. If you haven't tried it yet I highly suggest it. It's so much better than IE and it lets you do so much more. I've only been playing with it for a while but so far my favorite feature is the easy way to zoom in on websites. I have a 22'' monitor and like to sit back away from the screen but with IE you can't always read everything. I constantly have to sit up and look closely at the screen then go back and get comfortable again, then do it over and over again. With Firefox not only does it let you zoom kind of like the Wii's Opera browser but it re-formats the website so you aren't missing anything to the sides like you would with a Wii. All you have to do is press "ctrl" and "+" and it even saves it so next time you go to that site you don't have to mess with it. The best thing about that is if you have a widescreen monitor you can use all that space to the sides that is otherwise unused. Seriously, if you're using Internet Explorer to view the web on you're $300 widescreen monitor you're totally wasting your money! It also has a built in spellchecker that underlines misspelled words in red whenever you type anything online. If you are looking at more than one site at a time, like I always am, then it opens the new pages in tabs instead of having to use entirely new windows. That way your taskbar stays uncluttered and allows you to switch between windows without having to scroll through 5 pages of internet to get to your music player or other folders you're using. It also saves your passwords better than IE so you don't have to type those in a thousand times. It makes saving favorite pages a one-click thing instead of a 5-step process. You can open all of your most visited web sites with one click and it remembers where you were if you shut it down and then come back to it. You can use it to change the appearance of other websites like making Google's homepage black, for example. Plus, it seems to load webpages faster. Give it a try, the download is small and it only takes a few seconds: http://www.mozilla.com/en-US/ . For the longest time I was afraid to use anything other than Internet Explorer, now I wonder why I ever waited.

Movies

For the benefit of my friends and family I've put up a list of the most recent movies I've seen in the theater and rented on DVD/watched on Netflix on the right. For each I've given a 1 to 4 rating. One of four means it was absolutely horrible, as I'm sure you could guess. Two means it was okay but I wouldn't watch it again. Three means it was great and I highly recommend it. Four means if you haven't seen it you should make it a priority. I'll only give a four if I think the movie was spectacular. If you have any suggestions for me I'd love to hear them. I love movies and I know there are hundreds out there I'd like but won't see unless someone tells me about them. Again, this is only intended for my family and friends. I don't presume to know anything about filmaking other than that I either liked or disliked a particular movie. With that being the case I'm sure you'll see a distinct prejudice for action/thriller type movies as that is my favorite genre.

Gangsta Rap

In case any of you were wondering if I was just kidding when I said I like gangsta rap take a peek at my music folder. I really don't like much else.

The First Law

During the last few months of nursing school I was really looking forward to reading a novel of some kind. I had a list of things I wanted to read which included everything from spy stories to non-fiction about the middle east. When I finally did finish school, however, I found that I was so sick of reading for study that reading more, even for leisure, was the last thing in the world I wanted to do. I tried a few books but got bored to death after just 30 pages or so in every time. Even reading my favorite authors felt like work.

Then a friend loaned me his copy of The Blade Itself by Joe Abercrombie. Holy crap what an awesome book! You would have to classify it as fantasy, definetly not my favorite genre, but it's unlike any other fantasy out there. The characters are real and imperfect, selfish at times, downright evil at others. There is a part where one of the heroes is faced with a decision between doing the right, noble thing but instead wreaks vengeance on someone who absolutely deserved it. After the scene, the author doesn't set out to teach us a morality lesson. Things play out like they would in real life. His act is never discovered and the world is better off, though the character is hardened and guilt-ridden by his decision. Your reaction instead of oh well... I guess it was the right thing to do is to practically stand up and shout yes! Take that you bastard!!!

So much fantasy is so watered down and polite that it makes you mad. The heroes may be flawed but ultimately they are all so graceful. I remember watching Prince Caspian this summer and (I don't remember their names) but there is a point where the heroes sneak into Prince Caspian's, or whoever's castle and have a chance to kill um... the antagonist? but no, they let him go and dozens of people are killed in a huge battle sequence later. Then there's the final duel where he's shown mercy again and is given yet another chance to live. He isn't killed until he's had several opportunities to redeem himself and numerous innocents are sacrificed. It drives you crazy! What's-his-name should have been beheaded when they had him! But what kind of lesson would that have been?

Joe Abercrombie didn't write The Blade Itself to teach you a lesson. It isn't written with the pre-teen sensibility in mind. Sure there is morality in there. Of course each action has a consequence. But the reader is allowed to judge for himself if he thinks it was right. Sometimes things work out for the best, sometimes they don't. One things for sure, you always can relate to the character. And I'll promise you this: when your done you'll be able to remember their names!

My Illustrious Return

After 2 years with no posts, I decided to update my blog! Just the one pic for now, Lindsay is cuter than ever isn't she? Check back later.

Postalveolar Fricatives

I’ve always had a difficult time helping people pronounce my wife’s name correctly: Jayanne, an orthographic Americanization of the Brazilian name Jaiane. It’s the first syllable that gives every body trouble.

Apparently, very few people are capable of voicing a postalveolar fricative word-initially. The sound is a central consonant, which means it is produced by allowing the airstream to flow over the middle of the tongue, rather than the sides.

In order to produce the sound, one must understand the manner of articulation. Because it’s a sibilant fricative, it is produced by pushing air flow through a groove in the tongue at the place of articulation (see below) and directing it over the sharp edge of the teeth, causing high-frequency turbulence.

Its place of articulation is palato-alveolar, that is, partially palatalized postalveolar (see point 5 in the figure), meaning it is articulated with the front of the tongue behind the alveolar ridge, and the body of the tongue bunched up, or “domed" at the palate. Most Americans tend to labialize the sound.

The sound is common in French, where it is represented by the letter j but it does occur in English. When falling word-medially or word-finally most have no difficulty reproducing the sound correctly, albeit labially. Consider the letter s in the word “treasure” or the final sound in the word “mirage”. It’s initiating the word with the sound that confounds people.

As for the other two syllables in her name, even I don’t get them right.

My Flickr Page

I now have a Flickr page for photos. Access it by clicking here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/thenotoriousben/ Or, you can go to flickr.com and search members for "the notorious ben". There is also a shortcut under "links" on the right.

More Pics of Lindsay Giselle

Once again, I'm sure your baby is cute. But my daughter defines the term. More undeniable photographic evidence below:

Americanization

I received an email from a co-worker this week in the wake of the Mexican protests about immigration. It's a chain mail letter that's been circulating the 'net for a while now but is apparently increasing in popularity. I've seen immigration from both sides having basically lived as one myself in Brazil then bringing my Brazilian wife over here as an immigrant. Below is the original email followed by my response to the co-worker who sent it to me:

Subject: Theodore Roosevelt's ideas

Theodore Roosevelt's ideas on Immigrants and being an AMERICAN in 1907."In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American an assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American. ..There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag... We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language.. And we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."

Theodore Roosevelt 1907

PLEASE, Pass This On!!!!

This was my response to the sender:

Thank you for sending me this email; it is certainly fodder for intellectual banter. As I’m sure you are aware, I have very strong views with regards to immigration. If I may add some thoughts…

“Americanization” was a subject Roosevelt became very passionate about during the last years of his life. I don’t really study history too much but I do study immigration quite a bit, that’s the only reason I know! Anyway, he actually did not write this in 1907, he wrote it in 1919, 3 days before he died. It is part of a larger letter that he wrote to the American Defense Society (I had to look that part up).

I agree with Roosevelt on many of the subjects about which he spoke but I think he went too far on more than one occasion. He was the first one, for example, to say, "Every immigrant who comes here should be required within five years to learn English or to leave the country," something that has been repeated by countless politicians and citizens since. I personally feel that this statement by Roosevelt is absolutely absurd. Not everyone is capable of learning a new language in just 5 years, especially those who come from countries whose native language finds its roots in anything but Latin.

To the best of my knowledge, Roosevelt never attempted to learn a second language. In fact, he vehemently opposed that any language but English be taught in public schools. To impose a penalty as severe as deportation as opposed to say, additional assistance to those who required it, demonstrates Roosevelt’s ignorance on this subject. Not only that but I think this particular idea gives us some insight as to how Roosevelt truly felt about immigrants. I find his attitude baffling considering that 100 years ago most American’s own immigrant forefathers were so much less distant as compared to today.

While I do agree that we should all be united under one common banner, it is my own opinion that Roosevelt’s philosophy of “Americanization” is outdated and out of place in modern-day America. I would even go so far as to say that Roosevelt used his political cunning to hide more malicious thoughts behind his public image.

I’d love to hear your opinion if you’d like to respond…

Thanks again,
Ben

I subsequently received an apology from the sender. I wasn't offended, however. I fact, it was enjoyable to be able to discuss an issue that is significant to me with an intelligent individual.

One final thought on the original message. I don't think that many who send this email around truly understand what Roosevelt said in this letter. In Roosevelt's words, "...it's an outrage to discriminate against any such man... But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American."

Maybe people don't understand what predicated means. He said that it's wrong to discriminate against any man so long as they act like Americans. That implies that if any immigrant retains their individuality it's okay to discriminate against them! I can't even begin to imagine what would happen if the President of the United States said that same thing today!

Roosevelt is one of the most well known and beloved presidents and his ideology had a place in American society in the early 1900's. We should remember, however, what the country was like in those days. Whites dominated, segragation was the norm, and racism was socially acceptable. In that context Roosevelt was exceptionally tolerant. I'd like to think, however, that we've progressed in the last 100 years and that statements like these are no longer appropriate.

My Daughter

So, you think your baby is cute do you? Everyone says so, right? People stop you in the mall just to say "oh, what a little angel!", right? You just can't imagine a baby cuter than yours, can you?

Well that's because you've never seen my daughter, Lindsay Giselle!

And all those people who tell you how cute your baby is? They've been patronizing you.

Playing the DS

Just to show that my daughter really does indeed love Nintendo, here's a shot of her playing Nintendogs on the DS. Her favorite, however, continues to be the GBA SP.

Daddy's So Proud!

Last week my daughter spotted my GBA SP on the nightstand and pulled it down. She then opened it up all by herself and started pushing buttons. When she brought it over to me I turned it on and let her play with it. She's been crazy about it ever since! I even placed the Gameboy next to her favorite stuffed kitty and had her choose between them, just to see what she'd do. Wouldn't you know it, she went strait for the Gameboy!

I don't think she's seen me play GBA myself more than 2 or 3 times, so how she knew how to hold it so perfectly is beyond me... maybe Ninty love is genetic. But really, have you ever seen a 14-month old baby girl so enthralled in old school Pac Man? Incidentally, her high score is 1,440 which is like once around the board. Perhaps you can do better but can you're 14-month old? Heck, can you're 3-year old beat that?

Summer Smells

I was driving down the highway with my wife the other day when we chanced upon a certain odor about which my wife commented: "Eka, catinga de gambar!" (Ew, skunk stink!). I had to pause a minute, however, before affirming agreement. After a long winter, the smell of skunk immediately reminded me of summer. I couldn't, therefore, indicate that I found the smell particularly disagreeable at all. Which got me thinking; there are quite a few other offensive aromas that I really don't mind. Rotting brine shrimp, for example, is very nostalgic to me. It reminds me of warm summer breezes off the great salt lake. What malodorous emanations do you find less than objectionable?